Twas the Night before the IEP...

Cute ditty for the holiday season that rings true for much (or most) of
us parents with exceptional children! Enjoy!!
========================================================================== Twas the night before Christmas and all through the schools
No students were present to break any rules
The budget was written and every dime spent
with no one quite sure where it all went
The school board was snuggled
all safe in their beds
While visions of budget increases danced in their heads
When all of a sudden there arose such a clatter
They leaped from their beds to see what was the matter

Away to the board room they went in a dash
to see who it was that threatened the cash
And there before them - who did appear?
With issues they thought finished this year

Once more before them plainly to see
Were parents of children they called "Special Needs"
We've done this before and we were quite clear
So once again tell us why you are here
One of them stepped forward and it soon was apparent
That this person before them was one informed parent.
The presentation was prepared with great thought and care
With federal law quotes that brought them great glares

With a voice loud and clear they were all called by name
These are not new laws and the meaning is plain
IDEA, ADA, LRE and 504
It is time to remind you just like before

We wish you good tidings great hope and good cheer
The time for inclusion is finally here
Why won't you listen to this our plight
To be included is not privilege but right

We want them included right from the start
To become part of the whole and not kept apart
We want them included and yes all means all
Don't make them feel different, don't make them feel small
For such a long time the seed has been planted
why do we still struggle for what to others is granted
"No not right now but we'll tell you when"
We've heard that same story again and again

So on this the holiest of nights
we say inclusion is not a privilege but a right
and on this issue we firmly do stand
the rights of our children we do now demand

As the meeting concluded ending the night
It was heard.........

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL
AND TO ALL EQUAL RIGHTS
~ Author Unknown ~

Sigh of relief.....

Well today was the big day starting at the other school :)

Stinger was asking questions abt questions on our way down to the school-and they weren't abt school-LOLOL-he was nervous-I could tell;)

We get there and the teacher is right out front "Hey there bud!!" she says as if she has known Stinger all her life. :) Bailey smiles :) Mr X was there too-to make the transition easier. They hug-and Stinger hands him a gift and a card he hasmade. Stinger just had his eyes on a BIG OL" toblerone bar-so thats what he got -LOLOL:)Then all the paras came out and said hi to Stinger. Stinger kept fiddling with his collar-he does that when he is nervous;)But it was VERY nice of them to meet out there like that-very relaxed and nice.

Stinger is quiet and one of the paras asks if he is nervous-he shakes his head yes.
Then they tell him to say goodbye. Stinger says "bye Mom" without even looking at me. I ha to BEG for a hug and kiss and then away they went all in tow down the hallway-me looking on and just ...hopeing...hopeing for a turned head, a smile , a blowing kiss..I got no such thing :( Whaaaaaaaaaa-LOLOLOLOLOL.

Okay-I know this was a good thing guys-I know this...but gosh how I wanted ...something.....something to say Im unsure abt this Mom, tell me its okay, I need you to guide me and protect me.

Okay Ill stop before I start to sound REALLY silly-LOLOLOL, but it was HARD and thats how I felt!!! About as hard as that first day when Bailey was 2 1/2 and I was leaving him for the first time in that Early Intervention class.....hard picking up my feet, hard to look away.
Then as in now-not a batted eye was given. :(

What a trooper-Mommy wasnt as strong as Stinger was today.....

Stinger came home on the bus ALLL smiles and immediately pulled out his point sheet. Row of 5's all the way down(highest points you can get per time frame for behavior)
He loves it there-loves the toys at break time(they had a pirate ship), loves the teachers, everything he loves-LOLOL. The one thing he doesnt love is the lunches-"The food tastes different Mom, and I dont like it."LOLOLOL How it can be SOOO different is beyond me, but I guess it is????So we are going to have to deal with the change of cooking I guess, but I know he'll get used to it.

It was a HUGE success today-I couldnt believe he got a 5 on his Math chart-he has struggled all year in Math and thats when his worst behaviors come out. Not that he cant do it-he has shown us he can, but he just gets aggitated at math time. But he didnt today!!!!!We'll see and pray that this continues.

If the next couple of days turn out to be anything like today-we will have found a match-eh? A GOOD THING-yes?

Mr X asked Stinger to tell the teachers abt bees and away he went Mr X says-LOLOLOLOL
I had given them all a sheet of interests and dislikes etc on Friday....so they were in on the bees-LOLOLOL. And now I guess they are okay and in his circle of trusties. Another GOOD THING. :)

I think this school is growin on me already :)LOLOLOLOL

Mr X calls and is missing Stinger already and is coming to the house on Christmas Eve afternoon and dropping something off for Stinger. What a sweet guy-eh? Heart was always there-I think he just didnt know what else he could do with what all he had been trained in at that school-kwim? But he HAS grown attached to Stinger-I know Stinger will miss him too.

My Mom is always saying that people are put into your life for a reason, sent by the Lord to help......gues Mr T would fit that pretty well....He was a friend to me and Stinger when we both thought we didnt have any at that school....He'll be missed.

Truly my moms wisdom rings true.....as always :)

Im done...........

We have been dealing with a level system at the school this week. Trying to see if Stingers homeschool could do it-if they had the staff etc like at the other school.

Its been a misereable failure and Ive been called to come and get him everyday this week....sigh.....NOT WORKING! especially since they call now for anything they feel like it now...its rediculous....Stinger had an accident as well:( Which means they werent allowing him to go bathroom-have I NOT been over this with them????I am soooo done with this school. I abt cried when I heard abt the accident-they are just plain rude and mean....I cant even imagine how embarrased and hurt Stinger was during all of this..GRRR it makes me sooo mad. I get the tracker home and it said that Stinger asked and then had to wait an hour to comply to something. EVERYONE who cares to take the time to know Stinger knows that when he says he needs to go:HE NEEDS TO GO!!!!!I am sooo done with them....

Dh and I are meeting tomorrow with the behavior specialist and the teacher from the other school and just talking....Im scheduled to see the school on Friday.

When I went to pick up Stinger today the behavior specialist was there and they called me into the office. The behavior specialist touched me with something she said and the tears started to fall-Im soooo mad at myself......but o-well. Tears are falling way too easy these days:(

But she was nice and tried to console me. I dont know how she could see inside of me, but she wanted to make sure that I idnt think this was the end of the world and that it had nothing to do with parenting or anything I might think I had done to cause these behaviors. That Bailey just needed more guidance and structure that his homeschool cant provide. I couldnt have agreed more. That I wouldnt be up at the school like I am now, that I can come whenever I want though, that they have never in the 5 years she has been incharge, called anyone to pick up their child.There are NO suspensions. That she knows it has been hard on the family and that this wasnt MY fault, that I had done everything I could, that it wasnt that I had failed. How did she know I needed to hear that last part-LOLOLOLOL. How did she know?????

Inside I know this school has tried, but lately they seam to be throwing up their hands alot-which is frustrating as I have been pulling for Stinger so hard this week as I knew it would be the deciding factor with his placement. So they want to meet with dh tomorrow and will have someone there to watch Monkey boy.

He cant stay at his homeschool-its just not working so its this other placement or homeschooling.

Ive been praying ALOT and I have a peaceful, calm feeling about this other school. But I am a worrier by nature so to have these feelings has been not expected :)So I am okay slightly with it now. We still has some concerns-but hopefully we can all talk tomorrow and everyone will come to some agreement.....If he goes to this other school he would start going on Monday or I could keep him home until after Christmas break-which I think is a VERY bad idea. I much like it starting a week before break, then having the break and then going back to something he is already familiar with. I think thats the best plan.....but we will see how the meeting goes......

Im tired-Im gunna go watch some of my English shows-LOLOLOL They always make me laugh.....Im in need of a couple of those-eh?

"Yesterday...... All my troubles seamed so far away...."

Now it looks as though they're here to stay
Oh I believed in Yesterday........
------Paul
........sigh

Well my meeting on Monday was good I guess. The time out room is now gone...Much to EVERYONES dismay....The time being kept after school is gone....much to everyone's woes me's....

They are to call me if it gets out of control, I'm to pick him up. Then they will call another meeting the next day.(what this does???-I guess I'm just not understanding things)
IF no incidents-then Mr X is to graph and chart behaviors and time owed instances...GR-8 plan-we all know what its going to say = THE PLAN STINKS. And then we will meet in 2 weeks.

Stinger is not a typical kid-he's not going to respond to typical punishments. And no one will listen to me on this so I don't know what to do......Goodness knows Dh and I have tried typical punishments to no avail....But "don't listen to the parents whatever you do as we know nothing deal"....

I did actually get some interesting info abt the other school placement:
1. Based on a level system:1-4
1 being very restricted-eating lunch and having recess in the room etc
4 being just going in the room for awards and tracker updates...
Based on the child's behaviors depends on how much responsibility and choices they will have in the reg classroom and how long they will be in there. The academics would not drop as the same things are required as they are now...As they have seen what he can do...Its an 8 child: 4 adult room.

The behavior specialist was quiet frank with me and I asked her what the probability was that he would come back to his homeschool. She said "he wouldn't"......She said that this was the goal, but once a child is put into such a restricted environment and has the supports there they need it is nearly impossible to go back to what was before without upsetting things and having the behaviors come back....She said a child could be doing VERY well, but the point being that there at the school should incidents occur they have the paras and staff that are trained so it can be supported and stopped etc whereas the homeschool doesn't etc. Its a k-5th grade program so he would then go to his homeschool middle school, but it has this same support program and he would be supported there he would just sort of transition into it.... I'm still kinda unsure of all the details, but it was explained to me much clearer at the meeting. Id have to see it in session and talk with the teachers before dh and I made any decisions.....So its something we both have been thinking about anyway....

After the meeting I sat down with her privately and I told her thet I feel taht the school is making me feel like I am asking them for too much-and she told me that she woudl be the judge of that...She got persoanl and almost cried adn todl me taht she understood what I was going though as sh ehas a grandchild and she knows how teh system works and she has tried everything and her grandson was mainstreamed then self contained and then placed in a treatment facility. She acknowlegded Stingers disability was life long and that she knew I was just trying to help my son. She is in charge of that other school program and its really good, but that she wasn't forcing or trying to make me think this was our only option at this point-she still wants to work with this school...
It was finally nice to be acknowlegded and agreed with by her-someone who actually understands what I am dealing with. I was fighting tears the whole time-fighting them...I just dont know what to do here.....but talking things over with her was nice.....

Could use some prayers out there. I just wish I knew for certian what is the best thing-what would be the best for Stinger and have him happy-kwim?

Yesterday he was running away agn, being VERY defiant.
Today I got a call from the principle that when the bell rang he ran away and missed the bus-so I was to come and get him. The principle was very upset when I got there. I get a call later on during the night that he is to be suspended until we all have a meeting-which is tomorrow. The principle said he didn't know what to do and that he was just going to let Stinger trash his office....( I know he was implying he wanted to use the timeout room)gee I am VERY glad I took the timeout room away-as I NOW know he sure isn't competent enough to use it correctly....

Stinger and I sat down and talked abt a lot of things. He told me that the Principle told him to sit in a chair for 1 min and Stinger said he had to go to the restroom and the principle told him to just pee in his pants then and he'd clean it up!!! I am VERY upset with this.......I saw how upset the Principle was so I think he probably did say this to him......That floors me!!!!

So I call dh and we start talking about how we think its a staff problem and how this other school is sounding better and better......

But on to better news good grief......
The Mental Health Dept is evaluating Stinger and they have SOOOO many services that Stinger could benefit from like social skill classes etc. Which I am soo thrilled abt. I thought these doors to services were closed as we couldn't qualify fro any Disability programs as our income etc. So I am just thrilled abt this and these will def help Stinger. He will be given a case manager who will support dif programs etc. THIS is what Stinger needs......I'm through with relying on the school for these things...So I'm glad I have other options....

I think im going to curl up tonight with a book-that always cheers me up some :)

Tomorrow..... tomorrow..... I love ya..... tomorrow...... your only a day away......LOLOLOL

Placement......

Okay here's my question:

1. Keep Stingers placement the same.(keep him mainstreamed in his regular class)
no friends
battling the school every year
academics improving every day
no understanding on the part of staff and students
behaviors just get worse and worse as the staff has no clue how to de-escalate Stinger
calls and reports from school ending in suspension-or threats

2. Change Stingers placement. (self contained classroom or smaller classroom)
understanding kids-COULD make friends
academics fall
behavior plans thought out and individualized
understanding staff and no punishment
not his homeschool
Stinger hates changes
no battling with the school
Stinger finally feeling understood and not treated unfairly
behavior under control in controlled environment
could he ever get out of there????


I don't know what to do here......both choices are just....... bad...sigh......

Am I just refusing to see that he just cant make it in this school...in a reg classroom????Am I thinking if I just put the supports there-just this one more support..... that he could????knowing that one more support isnt going to cut it...How long do I keep trying...How long do I keep fighting????How long does Stinger have to go through this????How long do I hold onto a dream and finally....... let it go.......

I think the whole problem here is me......:( The more I truly think abt it-THATS the problem :(

Okay here goes......

I've been dreading writing about this but I might as well-who knows-it might just give me some answers....I need em....

I've got a meeting on Monday with the school, with the district behavior specialist, director(my fav lady)basically the whole team and then some......Ill explain how this came abt-as Im sure you all are just DYING to know....sigh.....

This is going to be long guys....

I get a call abt 1:30 on Monday from spec ed teacher(well call him Teacher X)"well Stinger has been having a hard day and I feel we REALLY need to keep him after to make up some minutes" He had 45 min to make up for something or another. I have repeatedly told the school I DONT like the time owed after school-time owed period as Stinger cant keep up with all the time and why he is doing it...sigh.....but I am put on the spot. Im thinking okay school gets out in a bit so Ill just go and get him in abt an hour. I was going to town anyway.....

So I get there and he has 30 min to still make up. Plus in that time he has had to go to the "room"-ill get to that bit latter. So Ive got Monkey boy there with me which isn't a prop but Im kinda perturbed as I thought his time would be up. I am sitting in that office for abt an hour. I see teacher X coming down the hall..... with no Stinger he is running away from Teacher X-which is leading to more min being owed. I go call Stinger who is hiding behind the coat racks-I go to him and Mr X-Stinger goes out the school doors, but comes back to me.

teacher X says that Stinger has 15 min still to make up. Wants to go back to the classroom and sit fro just 15 min-when he actually owes abt another hour.....Ridiculous. Stinger doesn't want to go.Tecaher X grabs him by the wrists and Stinger tells him to let go-doesn't. We get him in the classroom. Stinger still wont sit down in the chair. I have to leave to go get Flamingo at Scouts. WE go back to classroom and Bailey still isn't complying. Teacher X asks me to leave.. Stinger starts to go crazy crying and begging me not to leave. Flamingo goes crazy thinking Im leaving her brother and saying he needs us. After consi=oling Monkey boy who is crying now as well we go and sit in the car and wait fro him to call me abt a half hour latter .I get the call to come and get him. So I go in there and Stinger has on his coat, but has apparently in just that short time said something rude to the teacher and is Agnew supposed to sit. I go and wait in the car agn. I see Mr X and Stinger going back in the building and Im thinking to myself don't even be going to the "room" abt 20 min goes by I go to the doors to the school-of course they are locked-so I go back to the car and wait...... and then I get a phone call and they meet me at the car.

I was there at the school till abt 6: 30. Livid does not even begin to describe my thoughts at this point. We leave....

I come home. Im upset, Flamingo is still upset as well as Monkey boy. Stinger has no idea why.....

I immediately sit down to begin my process of writing a letter to the school Specifically stating that the time out "room" isn't to be used now and forever under no circumstances. That time owed is to be kept during school hours.

I go and talk to Stinger abt it-his fingers are raw, tells em abt climbing on the doorknob in the room, trying to get to the ceiling to get out of there falling down repeatedly..... Basically having an episode in the room feeling like it is a prison-anxiety and fear going through the roof in there...Im just getting more and more upset inside- Im fuming....I put everyone to bed now and then I head upstairs and cry.......

So next day I get "the phone call." they are just going to call me if there is a problem and have me come and get him.......SHEEEEESH.. How in the world is THAT solving ANYTHING....and that we are having a meeting on Monday....

I have written and talked to everyone I can think of. I get the
1. Go and pick him up-make this work
2. They are making it your problem since you wont do what they want-DONT get him
3. Make them officially suspend him so it counts as part of the 10 days-which by law they HAVE to do SOMETHING after 10 days change of placement-which then Im sure they will want to discuss.
4. Get a Lawyer.

So I dont know what to do.

1. They still haven't done testing to find out WHERE these behaviors are coming from
2. They are Punishing him not DISCIPLining
3. They escalate the behaviors by using the"room"
4. They escalate by touching him and grabbing him-even after he has said to let him go-and hes not bad abt asking either-I saw this the other day.....

So Im trying to pull my head together yet agn for this meeting as no one will talk abt anything-they just say" well discuss at the meeting. Fun-eh?

I have no idea how the meeting is going to go-I don't know what my position should be either.......

Beautifil Song-PRAYER

Okay this song had me bawling tonight.....its by Celtic Women....beautiful......

PRAYER

Lift up our eyes
and watch us where we go
And help us to be wise
In times when we dont know.....

Let this be our prayer
As we go our way
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.

I pray we'll find your light
And hold it in our hearts.
When stars go out each night
Remind us where you are.

Let this be our prayer
When shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love

Let this be our prayer
Just like every child
Needs to find a place
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

Need to find a place
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

Beautiful...just beautiful....

A Thankful Day

Well I hope everyone out there had a wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday :)

I woke up earlier than the kids and dh as I was off to help with preparing the dinner at Granmaws & Granpaws. Most of the extended family weren't going to be there -so I had agreed to go in a bit earlier and help in any way I could. ;)Okay you all can stop laughing now-he-he;)But I really wanted to help as much as I could so I loaded up Flamingo and Monkey boy and away we went.

Papa and Nana were there and that breathtaking smell hit me as we all walked in. Nan had been up since dawn I imagine getting things ready, so I helped when ever they needed an extra hand. I know it was a lot of work for Nana and Granmaw-they did such a wonderful job and the turkey and everything was scrumshious :) It was wonderful to see Nana and Papa. We have all missed them so much since they have moved. I just wish we could have spent more time with them while they were here.

The kids were all decked out in their new outfits from Grami. They looked so cute. When Stinger came with dh I was so impressed with how he looked -so grown up. Grami usually buys them all matching outfits, but she said that Stinger has gotten older and it is harder to find matching outfits in his size now. So she had bought him some cargo pants and a blue/white checkered shirt with a green vest pullover sweater. MY...... He did look smart....So grown up...Sigh.......

Everyone was so well behaved and I couldn't have been more thankful to have such a wonderful family and be surrounded by so much love at that table. My eyes start to tear up just thinking how blessed I am.

I know at times on here I sound like such a drag. Complaining and worrying is what I have become very good at. But sitting around that table-I realized what is important-what has always been important and should be the most important thing in my life. The love and support of family. How blessed we each are. Papa said a very special prayer and it was beautiful. Mentioned everything we should be thankful for, yet often don't think twice abt. I know I for one, was bowing my head in shame at that moment-realizing how I have let worries and selfishness engross my heart all to often lately.

Thank you Papa for reminding us all how lucky and fortunate we all are and how our hearts should be so thankful of all of our blessings each and every day.

I'm going to list my blessings: Hey C-I'm tagging you to do the same;)(hey we both have no clue how this works-right) LOLOLOL So you count yours too and post them-eh? I know its going to help me see how truly blessed I am......

1. My love I have for the Lord and knowing I am His for always
2. The Word for which is my guide and beacon to live by
3. My hard working,loving,devoted husband
4. My children who are fashioned perfectly in the will of their Father
5. My Dad and Mom who give unselfishly always
6. My Grandparents who show me that love and devotion truly can last forever
7. My friends who give me strength to carry on when times are dark
8. My humble house which I call home
9. My health and that of my family and friends
10. My country whom many have fought and died for

There are MANY, Many, Many MANY blessings we each should be thankful for. I hope you each had a wonderful THANKSgiving Holiday. You are all in my hearts and prayers{{HUGS}}

One of my all time favorite hymn songs:

"When upon life's billows you are tempest tossed
When you are discouraged thinking all is lost
Count you many blessings angels will attend
Help and comfort give you till your journeys end."

"Count your blessings name them one by one
Count your blessings see what God hath done.
Count your blessings
Name them one by one
Count your many blessings see what God hath done."

T

A Great Night!

WEll we had the 2nd grade performance tonight.

I had called teacher and had been asking how he was doing with the practises. Two day ago the lady who was supposed to be there(I later learned) for him wasnt there and he escalated to climbing on things, running away etc. But he did a great job at rehearsal on Thursday so I hoped he would do well that night.

Dh wasnt going to be able to make it. So It was just going to be me, Flamingo and Monkey boy. I was expecting an interesting night.

We get there abt 20 min early and all the kids are lining up on the stage-not Stinger-He wants to stay with us till the last minute-okay. He then goes up there without saying bye or anything and stands in his spot.

He starts messing with his collar agn and agn-a collar that never bothers him, and starts to rub his eyes. I could tell he was sooooo uncomforteable and yet he kept going strong-what a trooper-eh?

The kids were all so animated and smiling and laughing. As I was gazing ard them I notice that Stinger is the only one not joining in on this fun. NO hand movements, no clapping, no shouting etc. He actually looked like someone had a gun to his back the entire time. I could tell he was trying soo hard and was just soo nervous.

Mr X (Stingers spec ed teacher)had stated that Stinger was just soo excited abt this and that he was soo happy we would be coming. He had promised to Mr X that he would make good choices. One night he was goofing ard and wouldnt concentrate on what I was saying to him and I told him that we just might not be able to go-not him or anybody. Stinger actually broke down and cried-I had had no idea it meant so much to him and regretted threatening him like that. But anyway He sooo wanted to be apart of this performace, but you sure wouldnt have guessed that by the look on his face that night.

I had a smile on my face I think the entire time as not once was there ANY behavior issue!!!!I was so proud!!!!!!

The program finished (abt an hour)and Stinger came off the stage and was sooo proud of himself and was all smiles and hugs to me. It was wonderful to have seen him try so hard to keep it together, had kept it together beautifully , and was now proud he had done it. Wonderful!!!!

Of course we ended the night with icecream! A tradition that we have kept from my parents.

Stinger ended the night by telling me as I tucked him in that "It was ethe best day ever wasnt it Mom? " :) :) :)

I know he got this from the Sponge Bob movie we had just watched a day before. But it never sounded so sweet as it was coming out of his mouth that night. There is no doubt in my mind he had sweet dreams that night..........

Bumpidy Bump Bump...sheesh......

Can you say Sheesh.........???? I just got back from consoling and checking on Monkey Boy. Flamingo and Monkey Boy were goofing ard downstairs and I hear this
-BUMP-. Then an ear piercing scream. It sounded like Monkey, and yes, hes been bumping into things agn. But this scream.........these screams freak me out. It was the type where holding your breathe and trying to let noise come out kinda deal. Past experiance tells me its not a good sound......

So I rush downstairs and see a HUGE knot on Monkey's head above his eye. So we get some ice in a washcloth and lie down. Its now purple and hes not wanting to eat. But his eyes look okay and hes not puking*knock on wood**crossing fingers and toes* Hes acting normal-just not eating his lunch. I dont know if thats the bump talking or him just being Monkey Boy-LOLOLOL

So I will be keeping an eye on him today......but talk abt scary. I just hate bumps like that and screams that go with them. I think its the scariest sound coming from any of my kids.....sigh.......You hate the sound, yet while its happening you keep telling yourself"okay keep making that noise!!!!" because that noise means things are OKAY!!!!kwim? Flamingo has had a few of them-but I dont even like to talk abt those incidents, but thats probably why I freak when I hear it as I remember those times with her. I REALLY freak!LOLOLOLOL But it looks like things are okay.....now.

We FINALLY have a fridge agn! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)
Who could have thought something could be such a luxury-LOLOLOLOL. But Im tickled pink!!!!To have one back. We ended up getting a freezer on top one-not a side by side. Dh says that the older it is the better as the new compressors in the new ones are only good for abt 5-6 yrs. So hopefully this one will last a bit longer*knocking agn* LOLOLOLOL It was getting to be a real drag changing ice packs ard everything-LOLOLOL. I thought I coudl handle it, but no, I started missing my fridge. I was even going back into my wonderings if I COULD live off the grid-but I think I would be a sorry case-LOLOLOLOL

Flamingo has Girl Scouts agn tonight. She is supposed to bring old toys that they are going to donate. I had to keep a watchful eye on this process ...LOLOLOL She just kept wanting to give away her favorite pink things as she knew some girl would just love them. She is so tender hearted and so giving. But she should have fun tonight. Me and the boys will proabably be going to the park-as it is pretty nice today(gotta use them while they last-eh?)

Winter is just ard the corner and Im starting to feel it already in the air. Its WONDERFUL-my fav time of the year. Strange as I hate Hate HATE!!!being cold. But I love the winter season and the feelings of happinesss that seam to radiate everywhere and through everything-I LOVE IT!!!!!! :)I even enjoy scraping snow off the pavement-crazy I know-LOLOLOL I smell fireplaces and my nose burns-Its BLISS for me!!!Good thing Im so goofy as winters here seam to last for awhile-LOLOLOLOLOL

A Little Recap......okay we all know its NOT going to be little;)

I have beeen OHHHHHHHHHHH so slacking on this blog-or so I have been told-LOLOL;)
I had the intentions of writting in her abt every three days or so...so Im going to try and do better. I just havent been spending that much time on here now that things are calm ard here for a change....

Ive been trying to do my daily Bible devotions, been reading alot, been chilling at night-with my English sitcoms, and have been trying to start my cleaning routine that I havent been keeping up to par. Its actually been very nice. At first I felt annoyed with nothing to do as reseaching and worrying have been my norm for sooo long-but Im gradually finding my groove agn. Things crop up every now and then at school-but they are minor and then we just try and move forward-kwim?

So anyway.......FRIDAY:

Stinger and I went to the theatrical production of James and The Giant Peach. It was LOADS of fun. I went as a helper with the class. I was pretty nervous as Stinger has never been inside a theatrical place before-and I was unsure of how he would react to things and how quiet he would be able to sit. The 3rd grades and 4th grades also went and were sitting right behind us. Stinger was by far the best behaved child there. I couldnt have been more proud!!!! Twice he looked at me with a big smile on his face and said "This is fun." I KNOW he enjoyed it. I think at times the actors talked to quickly for him to really understand what they were saying -but in the theatre every emotion is WAY exagerated and he pretty much could totally understand what they were doing-which was fantastic. I even noticed the 3rd and 4th graders in back of us were soooo noisey-they were actually very annoying-but it was hard not to still bask in Stingers delight. After it was done he hugged me and told me "Thanks for coming with me Mom." So it was wonderful and a wonderful experiance. :)

Friday was also Flamingo's B-day-which they celebrated at school. Each child draws the B-day child a card-and they were awful cute :) Flamingo also got to wear a shiny B-day hat all day long-which Im sure she loved. She handed out her treats that she had brought and said the girls really liked them-LOLOLOL;) She had brought Polly Pocket fruit snacks. But was kind of dissapointed there were no left overs-LOLOLOL. But I had bought an extra box waiting for her at home-LOLOLOL.

Sunday we as a family celebrated Flamingos B-day. We woke her up, well she woke us up-LOLOL, bright and early and we made her go back into her room so we could sing to her-ha-ha! Does this bring back memories Nana and Papa??LOLOLOL Then we opened up her presents. Flamingos big thing right now is Strawberry Shortcake and Pets Shop. How Grandparents remember these things I have no idea-but she was VERY happy with these presents from her Grandparents :)So we finished opening her presents then had her breakfast. She had requested berry muffins with bacon and eggs. So she really liked that-it was quite nummy. Then we all went down to watch her Dancing Princesses movie. Im sure this was the highlight of Daddys day-LOLOLOL. We ordered Pizza then had cake-which of course had pink frosting. Flamingo had a time blowing out her candles-I had spread them out and I think she didnt like that too much-as she didnt want to get too close;)But she ate every bite of her cake-:0
Then it was off to bed and a good snuggle in with all her B-day treasures ard her-too funny to even write abt-LOLOLOL. But Im sure made for very happy dreams that night :)

Tomorrow is Halloween. Kids at school are supposed to dress up as animals-I guess they want to stay away from the scary costumes and such. Flamingo is going as a black cat-all dressed in black. Im going to do her hair up in black ponies too to look like ears and am going to paint her face cute too. The closest Stinger is coming is his pumpkin shirt-he doesnt want any part of dressing up-he doesnt want to be looked at. Which reminds me of something another Mom told me:

Stinger still wont wear any of his new school clothes:( But another Mom who's child is alot like Stinger says its a matter of not wearing something that will call attention to her child if hes wearing it. So I think thats what it is with Stinger as well. Which would make sense as all his shirts I got were what I would call "cool" but man-who knows what is "cool" these days. ???????LOLOL But they are pretty loud-kwim-but he said he liked them at the store, but when it comes to wearing them-its a no deal.....I think its a matter of anyone looking at him-which he thinks they would do with this type of thing-goes for pants too, etc-ask me how I know-LOLOL. Makes sense though doesnt it? I just wish I had thought abt this sooner-would have saved some frustrations on my part-but live and learn. So not wearing a costume is no surprise-and its no biggie I guess.

I think what I struggle with is thinking he isnt okay with something-that he feels different, when in actuality he could care less and isnt bothered abt not doing what everyone else is doing. He's happy abt things just as they are-so I should be too. This is hard though to remember and wrap my brain ard, I tend to push him-but Im working on it. I guess I struggle with knowing when to push and when to just let it go-kwim? I mean how much is too much, and how isolated do I let him be if he is content and happy to be this way? Like the hours he INSISTS on spending in his bedroom after school, the times he WANTS to be alone?????I just dont know the answers to these questions........maybee never will :(???????

Why oh Why Do I ALWAYS Have To Learn The Hard Way?????

WEll...... Yesterday was a turning point......

I wasnt keeping up on things and Stingers IEP wasnt being followed.Just goes to show-when things are quite-just like the kids-something is wrong or not right!RIGHT???LOLOLOL Have you not learned this already???LOLOL I thought we were doing sooo well..sigh....but little did I know his Speech Therapy hadnt been done AT all since the beginning of the year. He's supposed to get this 2 times a week-per IEP. Its pretty important as they are supposed to be working on eye contact, reciprical conversations, body expressions, facial expressions etc. Things Stinger really needs if he is going to want to socialize well.

I guess the Speech Therapist went into the hospital and she has been on leave this entire year!!!! And no-no one was replacing her, no one told me, I had NO idea. Until I asked Stinger how he was doing with this lady and he said he hadnt seen her???So I called the spec ed teacher and he said that it was taking longer than they had thought but that they should be getting a sub para for her next week. WEll.. next week came and went and yet no Speech still.

So I wrote the IEP commitee that I was aware of this, that Stingers IEP stated he needs this to benefit from his special education and that I knew they knew that an IEP was a Legal Document and that I was sure they were concerned abt this as much as we were.;) I requested a signiture and date and that compensatory services be started immediately. This is when they make up for missed services.

So I gave it to them and WOW! I heard back within that same day from the district, and principle and got an apoligy letter from the district and VOILA comp services started today!!!

Supposedly the paras who were supposed to have handled the Speech Therapist absents got a talkin to from the Principle also-as he had told the district this would be a problem and thought it had been dealt with a month ago when HE had brought it up.....

I went to the school today and asked for a copy of the letter and BOY-I was treated like a queen! LOLOLOL I have NEVER met such a nice principle as the one I met today. "Good Morning" -all chipper and a reminder that they would be dating and signing each and every speech therapy session-LOLOLOL
And get this: the principle told me on the phone that out of 60 kids who were getting, or supposed to be getting, Speech Therapy-I was the only one who had brought this to his attention. Now I know my nuttiness is worth every nutty look-LOLOL

So live and learn I guess-letters are the way to go my friends:) :) :)Microsoft Word I think is my new best friend-I just have this flutter feeling inside;)LOLOLOL
He-He;)LOLOLOL. We are going to be close-very close;)LOLOLOLOL

Now if only I had learned this in 2005!!!!!!

Mr. Mischevious

Tonight Stinger just cracked me up.

Last night I cooked something that I usually cook-nothing weird or out of the ordinary. But Stinger was NOT happy abt it-LOLOLOL, Hes so hard to please. Unless its a sandwich or a hotdog, or macaroni, or chicken nuggets-you can usually count on a grumble or some type of refusal and he'll go to bed hungry rather than eat.....So last nigt was no different. But he ended up eating half which is what I told him to do and got a dessert.

When I was a kid I had to finish my plate and I remember sitting up to the table for hours-okay maybee not hours, but a long time-LOLOL. I finally devised a plan and started dumping things into my milk glass. MY parenst never caught on-they did when I threw it away in the garbage-hence the milk deception was started.;)I thought it was pure genious and still do;) LOLOLOL

I was thinking about this last night watching Stinger and feeling sorry for him as they all drink with sippy straw cups down in teh TV room(to stop ANY spills)-hence no dumping into milk will take place for awhile anyway......LOLOL

So anyway....I was cleaning out the cups for tonight and washing out the straws. Something was in Stingers straw. Little bits of something kept coming out. I thought well sheesh.....I wonder what the heck is in there..... LO and behold guess what was plum full lodged into Stingers straw?????Any guesses?????YES, the half of dinner I imagine from last night.....GROSS:( LOLOLOLOL

You'd think Id be mad, but I let out a laugh at the pure genious of my son to do that.....I thought it was very clever-how could I be mad when he had thought up of something I hadn't?????It was sooo funny....and I chuckled on my way downstairs. Did I say anything-No...Ill just let that one go I guess.....

Kids-where there's a will-there's a way-eh? Unbelieveable!!!!!

An Eiree Silence.....

Well I just realized tonight that I havent been keeping up with how the youngins' are doing at school. So I think an update is in order-especially since things are going sooo well :)

Flamingo is doing really well and is coming home with all smiles and even some extra good notes and comments on her notes home. She has her 1st field trip coming up on Wednesday. They are visiting a hospital, a pumpkin patch, a park to eat lunch and a little zoo habitat deal where they can learn abt the animals. How fun -eh? !!!! I think Im more excited than she is-is this normal???LOLOLOL. Thsi week was drug awareness at school so they can come to school dressed in different things. Today was "boot" day, tomorrow is "wacky hair" day. Dont ask me what these thinsg have to do with drug awareness-LOLOLOL-I havent the faintiest idea!!LOLOL, but its been fun-okay agn-maybee more so for me;)

"Tomorrow", Flamingo explains, "is a day I can wear my hair Pink Mom" LOLOL-so we colored it tonight just little streaks here and there and on the ends. Oh was my little princess in heaven!!!!LOLOLOL I think I caught her looking at herself in the mirror at least 3 dozen times tonight-LOLOLOL-SOOOO funny!But we will be doing her hair"wacky" and it should be interesting.......;)

Stinger-everything has been way too quite ard here lately.........I dont quiet know what to do with myself lately...-note to self-(have been wayyyyy to much overly involved)LOLOLOL;)Im just soo used to looking up things on the computer-finding out what has been exactly going on, what I dont like, how I can change it, things that I need to support my case,obsticles to overcome, laws to study and research, etc.

He is doing VERY well-is a "joy" -from teachers notes. Ist been just very unsettling to say the least;)LOLOLOL. I keep thinking, "okay this is good...but..."and I just have to stop myself and ENJOY.....LOLOLOL. But its has been a pleasant change ard here. Me not being stressed so much, dh not being stressed so much, Stinger not being stressed so much.

He's come home from school with 100 on many math worksheets lately, and I notice that they have scribbles all over them. I ask him abt them and he tells me that he was just getting frustrated, and I say "But Stinger you got them all right-Way to go!!!!!" and he says "oh, I didnt even notice... and then smiles" How interesting-eh? I dont understand that at all....? I no longer hear "Im stupid Mom", or "The other kids can do this Mom" His confidence has shot way up :) Im so happy abt that!!!I think I can do this "Eeerie Silence" thing-I quite like it just fine :)

The Fun Season Begins :)

Well as every child is aware and every adult I imagine too-LOLOL;) Its that time of year agn: First its the spooky Halloween arrival- carving the pumpkins watching and talking about trick or treating, Second the stuffing your turkey belly-fun family gatherings were everyone eats and eats and eats, and last MY FAVORITE-Tis the Season to be Jolly-Christmas :)
This weekend we went all went out looking for costumes. Flamingo of course chose a tinker-belle outfit-AGAIN! LOLOLOLOL, ist different from lastyear, but basically the same. I did get her some body glitter and pink spray to have her hair her fav color-she was just excstatic abt this.....Stinger......well he took FOREVER trying to find his bee costume-and you know it just wasnt there -of course :( No pilice men either :( He walked ard fro a good half hour refusing to accept this fact......BUt I HAVE figured him out a little-its all in the accessories-LOLOL. We finally agreed to a soldiers outfit-green-loaded with a phone, hat, grenade, canteen, knife - the works-and he was satisfied. Monkey boy just wanted everything, and then changed his mind and wanted to be a soldier too, like his brother. So he is a soldier as well-but its a light blue ish. Which reminds me that I need to go and get some face paint that I forgot.......
They are all excited and we had a fun time picking them out-now the really fun part-waiting! LOLOLOL
Everyday I hear and am asked "how many days Mom???!!!!"And every day I realise just how much fun these times really are and how I will surely miss them.....

Just As It "Should" Be

I completely forgot to update this blog on Flamingos meeting.....

I looooooove her teacher:)She treats EVERY child as an individual-which is as it "should" be. Flamingo is doing very well-picking up things that she just wasnt interested in doing at home-I guess having a bunch of gaggling giggly girls ard will do wonders-eh? ;)LOLOLOL

She pointed out that since she is a lefty that she needs help in resting her hand down and positioning her pencil "just the right way" LOLOLOL-must be a teacher deal-as I had never even noticed this.....but Flamingo is now writing her name and positioning her pencil correctly and beautifully-:)

She did mention that for 3 weeks now Flamingo isnt getting her book out when she comes into the clasroom-like the other kids. I really didnt see the problem, but Teacher thinks this is a big deal, and hasnt quiet understood what is going on. We brainstormed a little abt it, both of us just have no idea-so Ive just been reminding Flamingo before she gets on the bus each morning to get out her school work and go to her desk. I guess this is supposed to be individual work and Flamingo just gets lost at this time. SO anyway, we have been working on this with reminders.

The meeting went really well and was REALLY short-havent had one of those in a LONG........ time-LOLOLOL, it was sweet and nice-just as it "should" be ;)LOLOLOL

Hmmmmmmmmm......

MOM-NOS posted something on her blog today that just hit me right in the gut. I think Im going to be changing a couple of things on my blog here tonight.....Its still me-but Im going to be changing a couple of things...From now on Im going to be writing about our Journey into the "Jungle" LOLOL;)

OKay....#1 is going to be Stinger-you only get one guess who this is-LOLOLOL
#2 is going to be pink Flamingo-yeah shes got the grace and beauty there,LOLOL but she is just also sooo FASCINATED to the point of driving me crazy with her"pink"
#3 is my little monkey-such a happy little guy-clowning and running ard in circles to make YOU dizzy just watching ;)
Anyway welcome to my little world of adventure :)

Parent/Teacher Conference Time once more...

Well today was Stingers conference with his teacher. We went over a couple of test scores etc-district class assessments. Stinger has improved sooo much in just a short time this year...His Math scores were unbelieveable-some he scored 100%-way above the average-shapes, sequencing, add and subtract) That sure made him proud of himself. Math was something he sooooo struggled with last year-getting so frustrated-and then giving up and not completing it. Total change this year :)But litte did we all know that he just needed a little help to get that knowlege out.....WHAT A CHANGE :)One thing that I think is interesting is that he is still insisting on using a number line and one of the goals we agreed on was that he would start to learn a counting method instead-be it hands etc, counting up from the started number etc. He seams stuck on this number line-so we are going to have to work on this.....I think its all a matter of him trusting something different and new-kwim? We just need to reinforce that it doenst change the answer-he'll still get it right ;)

Spelling and Writing we still need to work on as he is still quiet below his peers. His teacher actually defended his work on the wall saying that it didnt look like much of a sentence, but that he had done all the work himself and she was ecstatic abt it :) She said some REALLY nice things at the meeting. Stinger is sure lucky to have gotten her this year. I know I have been pretty hard on her at times, but I still feel that she is one of those teachers that you are oh so lucky to have.....

The spec ed teacher was there as well-emphasising how important it is whenever Stinger pokes or pushes-immediate timeout(we have settled on a chair instead*rolls eyes*) should be inforced, and I could tell that his regular teacher doesnt always inforce this-she stated that she hated to have Stinger missout on things in the classroom. Did I say how wonderful she is turning out to be for Stinger? LOLOLOL Then the two "talked and agreed";) how important it is for Stinger to stay in there as much as possible-LOLOLOL

She asked me if I would like a detailed report on the testing(no one has ever asked me that before)as I could see what needed to be worked on etc. I was all for that :)

So the meeting went extremelly well and I feel like she and I are totally on the same page here. She stated again how pleased she has been with Stinger-that they do have off days, but then he is right on track again-making sure his deask is straightend and tidy(WOW) and she loves having him in her class...:)

Flamingo's meeting is tomorrow and I will update on hers then......

Darned if I do...Darned if I dont.......

Okay well as most of you know I had my IEP team meeting last Monday.....I havent written abt it as I was torn all this week abt what went on and how I should proceed next. Ive been writting and getting facts and advice from everyone I can think of-and I have come to the conclusion that either of the outcomes are NOT good-in essence Im messed with no matter what I go with....

The MEETING:
Well I had my agenda-the school had theirs-as usual. My BIG issue was getting the timeout room-GONE!!!!I heard every line you could possible dream up-but my personal favorite was when the spec ed teacher said he felt he needed it for his OWN safety from Stinger!!!!OKay is it just me-or does this sound REDICULOUS!!! The ONE person on the team whom I thought was on my side-showed his true colors and I am not at ALL pleased.....Let me explain a little:
Stinger has impulse issues-a poke here, a tug of hair there. These have been a constant problem-when he is frustrated, when someone is too close to him etc. These impulse behaviors are just that-impulses-that he cant really control....and as soon as he has done the behavior they are GONE. Its not like Stinger is an aggresive child out to fight and beat up people-sheesh......and as far as I KNOW he has ONLY showed aggresion to the teachers etc-when they are"forcefully"(yes, their nice word for grabbing and making him)guiding him to the timeout room-hence if the timeout room WASNT THERE-it wouldnt be an issue. Is it just me or is this plan of "safety" purely ludicrous!!!

"We have timeout rooms in every school"-oh really then why was it last year you had to special order a window so you could see into this room for my child? oh I get it-every other school the parents dont care if their child is locked in a room and isnt being supervised, or better yet, the parents have NO IDEA-oh I see....UGH!!!!

Okay so that timeout room is getting difficult. As they seam to have every defense fo it-whether it be ludicrous or not-they are sticking to it.

Now-dont get me wrong-if a child is way out of control-is seriously hurting himself or others this might be neccesary-but a child poking someone with a weed at recess and going in there for 15 min-REDICULOUS!!! Its still in the emergency clause-so I guess this is what you would call an emergency.....???!!!!Timeout rooms ARE abused, parents arent given details, escalate the childs frustration, increase the anxiety, are a simple "get rid of the child", child learns to surpress feelings-having it turn into other coping bad behaviors:example-the bolting from last year)or worse depression...the list could go on and on abt what best pratices has to say abt it all....

I talked to them abt replacement behaviors-"dont want to" was the response-GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!NO sensory gadgets to keep him focused-as was suggested by the Occupational Therapist who tested Stinger. So basically they just want to punish the bahavior out of him-even though he cant help these impulses. They want a little robot that they can control. I asked them abt teaching him to ask for a break-"no". I asked them abt teaching him or giving him a card to ask for needed help-"no". So no replacement or alternate behaviors are to be taught to help HIM regulate.

Stinger isnt being watched at recesses-as is written in his IEP(legal document)he got plummeted repeatedly in the head with a soccer ball the other day from a 4th grader.....so I brought that up" well that was a one time incident and we ARE watching him"...oh okay-so I should just trust you all as you have proven in the past you can be trusted. "here's YOUR sign"LOLOLOL-hey I love that Jeff Foxworthy guy!LOLOL

So needless to say nothing was changed-everyone thinks everything is fine and I left pretty hot abt everything.....the behavior specialist wasnt even there-give me a break.....

I came home typed up a Letter of Understanding-basically what this is is restating everything that went on during the meeting and stating your case and what the schools case was and asking them if this was misunderstood to contact me back etc.
I also wrote up a PWR(Prior Written Notice)abt the timeout room. This SHOULD, I repeat, SHOULD be done by the school WHENEVER they deny or refuse something that pertains to your child getting a FAPE(free and appropriate eductation). They are suposed to detail their reasons, explain the testings they used,any other options discussed, why they rejected these, and all other factors that relate.

They are required to do this BY LAW-have they?-no, so I wrote this and printed this out too. The Disability Law Center told me to do this also....

So Ive got these two letters and they are sitting-LOLOLOL

I also have a no restraint and seclusion letter I found online which states you are and WILL not permit this treatment anytime or anywhere on your child. Which by the way these are all AVERSIVES-nothing positive has ever been proven by best practises to have any positive effect-especially with ASD children...and they ALL need a parents' okay...so I could just mail them this and be done with it.....

I know I will be awakening a sleeping lion and I just dont know if this will solve anything as I will have a whole new set of issues-and it could get REALLY hostile.....and I know they would try and change Baileys placement just to get rid of me and Stinger.....SOOooooooo I dont know what to do....DH says to wait and see if they do use the timeout room-as right now there is a first step that WAS added at this last meeting-a timeout in the resource classroom. and it might not be an issue this year....but my momma hunch (which is seldom wrong)says this is closer than we all want to admit.....

So I dont know-Im just darned if I do or darned if I dont....sigh.....

Im slowly going craaaazzzzyyyyyyyyy!AGH!

VENT comin' on strong...
Well I took the easy way out here.....Maybee if I vent my frustrations and feelings abt this it will just go AWAY!!!!!!!...sigh.......

Okay so littel Monkey is taking his quiet time out here with Stinger(as Stinger likes to watch a little TV before retiring to his room-its not really a quiet time now is it....well Im open for ANY suggestions here.....now we are dealing with the TWO of them-Stinger arguing that he doesnt want Monkey out here as this is HIS time-ARGH!!!

Okay-so I must tell you what the deal is with little Monkey here.....these repetative phrases.."it okay I close my eyes???!!!"I woke up bright and early at 4 AM this morning-just like I did last night and the night before, and the night before,with him crying and saying this and having a MAJOR meltdown as I wasnt there to respond to this phrase.....

Okay I didnt see this coming AT ALL-its been like this for as long as I can remember-me having to do certian things and having things just so at BEDTIME-I dealt with this with Stinger as well, so I thought it would get better???LOLOLOLand was somewhat just what I needed to do to calm him-so I did and he did-right? Well its getting worse-now its a quiet time too!!!!
This is how it goes(in case anyone wants to step into my world):

Monkey-"Goodnight Mom"
me-"Goodnight Monkey"
Monkey-"Have a goodtime on puter";)LOLOL He knows me well eh? LOLOL
me"Thank you Monkey"
Monkey-" Okay I close my eyes??!"
me-"yes Monkey, Its okay you close your eyes"
Monkey-" I love you Mom"
me-"I love you too Monkey"
Monkey-" It okay I close my eyes??"
Word for word-each and every time. And so the saga continues...after I close the door, after I go in the other room, after I go upstairs, and after I go to bed(hey I didnt say sleep did I?)....sigh....
So now its at nap(or quiet time)too....
I also forgot to prompt him to tell Daddy when he left today that(Monkey-" I have lots of firetrucks" needed to be said-so of course a meltdown and running to his room in tears-until I call Daddy and let Monkey say it yet agn.....(thsi also need to be said each and every time Dh leaves for work.

So I of course, consult the many experts of children and this is what they say:

"I have a friend who has high functioning autism and is an adult, she
says sometimes she repeats things to hear the sound of the words(she also
writes poetry and feels it is her way of communicating that works best
for her, she gets into a language flow that way). Sometimes kids repeat
things to get the same answer, because as she also says, she 'seeks
same" or predictability. These kids have so much trouble with transitions
and changes, that they seek something that will remain the same, that's
why many have repetitive behaviors, whether opening and closing things,
or repeating words and waiting for that same reassuring answer. As they
adjust to things, they may drop some questions, or not be as
anxious...just a couple reasons I have seen higher functioning kids give who can
express themselves.."

Okay so does that make me feel ANY better???????I dont think I have to answer that question........sigh....not right now anyway....sigh.....I REFUSE to think about it!!!!!!....

D-Day :)

I recieved this today through email........just incase anyone wants to understand what I was going through last year and why I was so against the time out room-that was being used 24/7......hmmmm.looks like I can FINALLY quote a case to them now. SOMEONE SOMEWHERE is FINALLY listening......:)YEAH!!!!!!!!!!:) :) :)

Court: Release names in timeout room

Published Wednesday, September 13, 2006 11:19:41 PM Central Time


By Kevin Murphy

Special to the Times

MADISON -- A federal appeals court ruled Wednesday that the
Department of Public Instruction must release the names of six unruly
special education children disciplined in Abraham Lincoln Elementary
School's controversial seclusion room to a disability rights advocacy
organization.

The Chicago-based Seventh U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals overturned a
decision by District Judge Barbara Crabb who denied a request by
Disability Rights of Wisconsin, Inc. finding that privacy laws
required the federally-mandated agency to get the children's names
from their parents or guardians.

Instead, the appeals court said that would be an undue burden on DRW,
which was established by federal law to advocate for and protect
individuals with mental illnesses or disabilities. Since both the
Department of Public Instruction and DRW are subject to the same
privacy laws, releasing the names to DRW isn't a concern, according
to the decision.

"To withhold the records in contention here is to give Š (DPI) the
last word over the abuse and neglect of the disabled or mentally ill.
This clearly defeats the purpose of the DRW and the (protect and
advocacy) statutes," according to the 19-page decision.

DRW attorney Jeffrey Spitzer-Resnick said the decision gives Crabb
discretion as to how the names of the children are to be disclosed,
including requiring DRW to keep them confidential, which Spitzer-
Resnick said the agency is required by law to do.

"We represent people with disabilities and advocate claims for people
with disabilities who are being abused. There's no question that
locking children in a room is abusive, and we have a right to that
information," he said.

School District of Monroe Superintendent Craig Jefson declined to
comment at this time, as the district received the court's decision
late last night and is still reading through it. He said the district
should have a response by Friday.

Abe Lincoln had two seclusion rooms, which were used to house
disruptive special education students for "time out" periods if their
Individual Education Programs permitted it. The one seclusion room
subject to DRW's injunction request was a five-by-nine-foot basement
room that was carpeted and locked from the outside without an
interior doorknob.

A parent complained to DRW in October 2004 about their child being
sent to the room without it being in their child's IEP. A Madison
television station then aired a program in March 2005 about the
seclusion room without naming the district.

The broadcast prompted other parents to contact DRW about the
seclusion room and since some of the children had limited verbal
skills it was difficult to determine if their child had been sent to
the room.

Responding to the broadcast and parents' complaint, the DPI
investigated Abe Lincoln and concluded that a seclusion room can be
properly used as a last resort disciplinary measure. However, after
finding that one of Abe Lincoln's rooms was used briefly when the
light was out and it lacked an interior doorknob, the district agreed
to replace the doorknob and add a larger window in the door to permit
outside monitoring of the entire room, according to the DPI's April
7, 2005 report.

With voluntary parental involvement, DRW has already negotiated
settlements with the school district for three of the children sent
to the seclusion room, said Spitzer-Resnick. As a result of the
settlements, one student was transferred to another school within the
district, staff was trained on how to avoid use of the seclusion room
and restraints and another child had their IEP rewritten to prohibit
use of the seclusion room.

A DPI spokesman said the agency hadn't seen Wednesday's appeals
decision and had no comment on it.

Spitzer-Resnick said once the DRW obtains the remaining names of the
students sent to the seclusion room, it's likely that new IEPs will
be written for them to address their education needs and allowable
disciplinary measures.

The decision comes after Monroe has addressed the seclusion room
problems at Abe Lincoln, said Spitzer-Resnick, so the impact of the
case will be felt elsewhere.

"What the decision clearly establishes is that the DPI shouldn't say
no to us anymore, nor should any school district. If they want to
litigate, they will lose," he said. --

Well...not to jinks a good thing........

Im concerned agn-Hey-WHATS NEW!!!!!!!!
Its this new teacher(okay.....I KNOW everyone adores her already..)
Its this friend that Stinger has(okay.....This is Wonderful that Stinger has a friend-I KNOW this)
Its just some things are not going as perfectly planned-LOLOLOL. Maybee Im just paranoid-as usual.
Stinger has been coming home with little things now-not all smiley faces etc-and they are at recess and lunch etc, PE etc. Ive had a talk with him to try and figure things out and honestly I dont know what to do.
Stinger was literally crying and upset abt getting a frowny face-and I was stumped.....Seams this new friend has alot of the touchy feely things Stinger was dealing with last year-trouble with peers, pinching, kicking, going back to his bullies-when he should be leaving them alone or telling the tecaher. Stinger feels that this is his best buddy and that it is HIS job to be out there ALWAYS by his side protecting him....be it maybee having to punch a kid to leave this friend alone...Stinger said numerous times he would do this....then he started to cry.:(
But anyway Stinger feels he needs to be there and teach this kid and keep him out of trouble-as he KNOWS what trouble is;)LOLOLOL, but he ends up getting caught right in the middle and of course doesnt understand that EVERYONE is watching Stinger and sees him involved-thus blaming Stinger.......I just told him that he needs to be VERY careful with choices he is making and that he needs to tell the teachers. But we all know what good that does. This friend is delayed as well so he doenst alwasy understand what peers are doing or meaning and takes things wrong I think too-just as Stinger does..
My heart is torn as we will probaly be having to go back to guided recesses(as we had last year)honestly dont ask me why we stopped. But now its going to be a REAL problem starting them agn, as he has made this STRONG attachment with this friend. So I dont know what to do. This is the 1st friendship Stinger has had with ANY peer and its not looking so good.....Stinger has done sooo well with his impulse issues and I am sooo proud of him, but this friend isnt having the same luck it seams and I dont know what to tell Stinger......
For example today-there was a kid waiting outside the lunch doors and told them that he was going to watch Stinger and this friend all recess-Stinger and this friend didnt like that they ran away then the kid chased them then they chased them etc.... and so the chasing began-and then Stinger got in trouble and recieved a frowny face:( This is what Stinger said-and hes not a lier at ALL. Thats one thing abt Stinger-he tells the truth-has never been caught not saying what really happend or anything that a typical kid does when they think they are in trouble-he comes right out and says what went on.He has given me no reason to doubt what he says when especially abt school issues-hes always been right on. So when he tells me something, and I have to pry it out of him, I sit up and take it seriously...He tells it all and says it like it is- But others dont believe him much of the time-which was the case last year-until the principle got involved-went outside and actually watched Stinger at recesses and noticed that he was indeed getting picked on like he said...sigh.....NO ONE believed us until then...
I talked with the principle abt it and he is concerned that Stinger isnt playing with any other kids etc and that they cant seam to seperate them. But if anyone knows Stinger this is not going to be an easy task if attempted and I can just see trouble.....Once he has something or someone stuck in his head, like he does with this friend-thats were he will be, thats what he will talk abt, and thats what IS important!!!-kwim? No talking him out of it just like his conversations-If its in there-thats what we talk abt etc.
Then the teacher......sigh......she has only nice things to say abt Stinger...but something just feels off. I talked to the spec ed teacher abt why the board wasnt being used(its in his IEP)Its a transition board to help him visually see what is coming next so he isnt anxious or worried abt things etc. He especially needs this at transition times as he gets very nervous-not wanting to go into the classroom etc-if he hasnt been prepared each and every time. The teacher has a "class" schedule but it doesnt help Stinger as he cant understand the words on it!!!????I even brought the board up at this last IEP meeting!!!!!So the speced teacher said he would talk to the teacher and now they have put pictures up by the words???-so still no board!!!!!When Stinger gets pulled out of class for his things speech etc-how is THIS schedule going to help him????Stingers teacher is also not wanting to disrupt HER schedule for hi social scripts(stating at the IEP meeting that "OH!He cant miss calendar time!!!" UGH...and then the sped teacher walking on tip toes ard this-not wanting to offend her.....he stated that the Social Scripts(they are stories set up just for Stinger that have certian situations on them-so he can see actual events taking place and are helping him know what to do when certian situations like that come up that he has trouble reacting to etc) are very important and that he likes to start the day off with them with Stinger so he can think abt them first thing-I am in total aggreement with this.....but then the teacher has her own schedule that cant be changed???
Little things like that are bugging me-I REALLY have no idea what is going on in that classroom and Stinger says he hardly sees his sped teacher at all anymore. How is that possible when he is suppoed to go to reading with him, writing and social scripts etc EACH day???? He is also suposed to coem into teh calls and help Stinger at Math time-So something is up.....
The teacher sent home Stingers spelling words and its words like amphibian etc????(Stinger had no idea what that even was)with no directions etc-Stinger had no clue what he was supposed to do with them-neither did I-so I had to call her and tell her that Stinger has a hard time remembering or telling me directions and that any info that needs to be conveyed back out to parents-no matter how little or big it is- needs to be written down????I still dont know if they are having a test on Friday-I HOPE not!!!!Since nothing was sent home abt it. But I dont think she is understanding how these little things are BIG things to Stinger and he needs help here.... I honestly dont think she has even seen the IEP-or why would she not know these things????
I dont know-its just bugging me is all.....I see this teacher and I know she is a good teacher. She is VERY structured and Stinger needed this,she adores him and all, was hand picked for him as were the peers in his class...but...its like she has her little ducks and doesnt want them out of order or out of HER line so to speak-kwim? And that is going to catch up with Stinger sooner or later.....I think hes been dealing with it REALLY well...but its going to catch up to them all I think as they arent supplying his proper supports as they should be.I just dont undersatnd thsi at all -and I feel like im a nagging parent here.....
But Ive got a meeting on the 19th-so hopefully we can get it all out then????
So the story begins yet agn........

Labor Day...

Well I know it was Monday-Im sooo slow.
So it was decided to try a Movie....:)I was voting to go to Willard Lake, but was highly outvoted when Dh mentioned a "movie anyone??" LOLOLOL.How do you compete with that!!!!! So Movie it was.....
This was little Monkeys first movie and our families first movie all together. Monkey was sooo funny-he was sooo excited, yet when asked abt it-he had NO IDEA! LOLOLOLOL Too funny;)Stinger and Flamingo have both been before with either dh and I or Papa and Nana-so they knew what to expect and were just as excited:)
We decided to see 'Cars'. Something everyone would enjoy. We had previously thought abt Monster House-but it got terrible reviews by parents-so that was out....
So we load up the kids with each their own propcorn/drink/candy(you know those combo meal things)Monkey boy was just beside himself and I think he had finished his popcorn before we even went in to the theatre-LOLOLOL. But not to worry-he stil had his candy and drink;)LOLOLOLWhew!;)Stinger and Flamingo did just fine carrying all their goodies and wouldnt think about having any help-lest they somehow loose one of the yummy items-LOLOL
So we all sat down to enjoy a movie for the first time EVER-and guess what......we all did!!!!!!It was one word and one word only-blissful. Okay I know what you are saying -how can a Cars movie with a bunch of screaming kids ard and a loud car screeching be anything "blissful"???But thats just it-I sat down looked ard-other parents looked frazzled, other children looked cranky and you could hear it.LOLOL Then I looked at our kids-eyes glued to the screen, smiles plastered from ear to ear on each face = blissful. Our little family each one in a total happy place.Its as if time wa sstanding still and we were all alone in their-kwim?
I knwo ist hard to understand. But when you have to think abt taking 3 kids with you wherever you go-these things all way out and have to be considerd. A 4,6,and 7yr old and the 4 yr old constantly a little monkey with ants in his pants, and Stinger a complete mystery how he will react to things-places and events are NEVER taken lightly-LOLOLOL. And WHEN they are a success-it is something to be celebrated and CONTINUED!!!!LOLOL
So I think we have decided to make this a monthly "family thing" it just went over soooo well.
We stopped at Sonic on teh way home and got a bite to eat-the kids were just so goofy-not touching anything, totally in the off zoning out etc-I guess the movie wore them out or they were just plum stuffed. They all nodded off in the car on the drive back home.
A great Labor Day?? I thought so........

A GREAT Week!!!!!! :)

Well we all survived here this week :)
Stinger has been getting nothing but good reports from everyone. He even got a post card from the teacher today in the mail telling him how proud she is to have him in her class and what a great job he is doing. I have seen a couple worksheets come home this week and I seriously cannot believe the change in concentration he is having. He finished two sides of a math worksheet(in one day!!!!) and only missed 1 problem. Last year he would get sooo frustrated that he could barely finish one side page......then he was throwing the paper and getting just so frustrated. He was so proud of himself when he was showing me his math pages-so-a total change this week...Also he showed me a picture he had colored in-was beautifully done. He had also written a STORY?????and pasted together a sunflower at school(I havent seen this one yet) but the teacher wrote a note home saying that Stingers picture was so well done and that he is quiet the artist!!!!!!!He had no patience fro drawing ANYTHING last year.....I have to keep pinching myself lately.......but it is wonderful seeing him work so hard and be proud of this work he is being able to do now:)THIS has been REALLY wonderful!!!!!!!!HE has been playing with a kid from 1st grade at recess-they are like two pees in a pod these days:)
Pink Flamingo has just been loving school-she comes home all smiles and loves riding the bus(she likes going down the steps-LOLOLOL;))She has been making fiends-everyday she tells me that she made some more-LOLOLOL-like that will surprise you??!!LOLOLOL She is doing really well and is just so happy. She has almost got writing her name down-this is too funny-she has to make it all pretty with curls on the "P"-LOLOLOL, she is also learning the pledge and almost has this down too:)Its very cute listening to that!
Little Monkey has a cold-then Flamingo has it, now Stinger has it too. Im just waiting for DH to catch it-he seams to catch everything they get-I dont-lucky me-;) LOLOLOL But Monkey has been rather moody lately and Flamingo too when she comes home from school-I try and put her down for a quite time, but she just wants to fall asleep on the couch. I think she's been working really hard.Everyone has been working really hard thsi week-Im a proud Momma Bear-yet AGAIN! :)
So its been a WONDERFUL week!Im praying for MANY, MANY more :)

WE HAVE A "GO"!!!!!!!!!!!!!:) :) :)

Well today was the long awaited day-"dum de dum dum duuuuuuuuuum......."LOLOLOL Oh Im sooo dramatic-eh? LOLOLOL-But honestly I just dont know where to begin!!!!
I got the kids ready for school-of course took pictures-Ive got a Kinder here-;)LOLOLOL. They both looked sooo darn cute.
We get to school and Stinger just had this look of judge dread on his face-Flamingo was just oblivios except for the fact she was going to school and just KNEW it was a GOOD thing!LOLOLOL;)
Stinger spots a little guy who he used to really like on his bus last year. And it was just "see ya MOM" LOLOLOL;) J/K-but pretty much. I had NO idea how good of friends they were. I heard a little abt him from Stinger last year-but he was in K last year so only went half day. Now he's in 1st and is there all day. So of course we all got our breakfast and sat down-Stinger next to him. This kid was just overjoyed to see Stinger-put his arm ard him and said "hi ya Stinger!!" It was too cute.They were just sooo cute there togther. He said to Stinger "Youre my bestest buddy Stinger". We're friends forever." I heard that and I abt cried.:)Stinger was just beaming. They are just the bestest buds I guess:)I think this kid is delayed in something too-but Stinger and him fit together perfect. Neither one noticing their differences:)What friendship couldnt be more perfect-eh? Stinger is kinda the quiet type, and this little guy is just all over-LOLOLOL. But that right there-watching them sure warmed my heart. So Stingers got a friend!!!!!!!!!He kept talking about another kid that used to be mean to Stinger and said that he'd tell him when he saw him;) LOLOLOL What a pall-eh? I heard today too that they were ALWAYS asking for each other at recess etc-and were never far apart-LOLOL:)Im sooo happy for Stinger :) :) :)
So I think that abt made Stingers day-seeing that this friend was there too:)
Flamingo was just too thrilled with the little pancakes to dip in syrup-LOLOLOL, got it alllllllll over her shirt-LOLOL. The bell rang and we went over to the Kindergarden line to wait for her teacher. There she saw her best friend from gymnastics-so from there on out it was "see ya MOM" as well-LOLOLOL. I swear-my kids were close to killin me-LOLOLOL. But as they walked away with the teacher the two of them were holding hands and Flamingo let out a "Bye Mom"-in the wrong direction that I was. I told her "Hey-Im over here Pink!!!"LOLOL;) She laughed and blew a kiss goodbye-and then they were gone-LOLOLOL.
:( :( :( :( :( :( LOLOLOLOLOL. Oh thank goodness Ive only got one more of these to do(little mONKEY)-but heck-like it ever gets any easier as they get older-eh? LOLOL
But I think Ive decided to have them both ride the bus tomorrow-okay Im still going to go inside with them for breakfast-but they'll be riding the bus home-LOLOL Hey-Im doing good-compared to a weeks worth of following the bus last year-but hey I might do that agn too-LOLOL. UGh-its soooo hard letting go.........I dont even want to go there thinking about next year.....sigh......
sTINGER went straight into his class-totally solumn look on his face and did exactly what he was supposed to do-NO CLINGING!!!!!!!WAHOOOOOOO!Waved goodbye abt three times, then went full force into consentrating on what the teacher had assigned them to do. WHAT A TROOPER-I was sooooooo happy!! :) :) :)
He came home saying school was "good"Im still not exactly sure what the "good"-meter reads exactly- LOLOLOL-But got all smiles on his tracker from the teacher. She told me when I picked him up that it was a wonderful day :) :)
The schedule is wacky right now-so no visual schedule for class(sTINGER told me that they do have somewhat of a schedule on the board-but he cant understand all the words-hence the need for his own visual one, and transition planning, etc-but he still did wonderful! YEAH!He said he really likes the teacher and she explains things to him when he gets stuck-:)and he likes her rules too-WOW-I know;) LOLOLOL.
He actually had his turn too talking about his new puppy-he had told me before school started that he WAS NOT doing this(the teacher wrote a letter asking every child to share something about them or something neat abt the summer, etc.-and I had told the teacher he was nervous and wasnt wanting to do this, so shE said shE would help him etc-this was when we had our meeting.-but nooo-he did it today!WHOOT!She must make him feel really comforteable-SUCH an awesome thing, and really a feat to master-eh?!!!
FLAMINGO wanted to show me everything in her backpack right there in the school hallway-she was so proud of her stuff that she brought home-and even got a sucker from the teacher :) LOLOL So "She's a good one Mom-See???!!!" LOLOLOLOL
So it was a GOOD day. :)
I left the pictures of the kids and the one of Flamingo on the counter in the kitchen-Dh said when I got home, that he had woken up and seen the pictures and had abt cried....See-so Im not the only looney one;) LOLOLOL
So our future looks bright-eh? There couldnt have been a prouder Momma Bear than me today :)
Little Monkey-REALLY liked having breakfast with just Momma Bear and Father Bear this morning. He kept telling us that he was such a Big Boy staying home without his "friends"-what he calls Flamingo and Stinger :)
Good-Good Day :)

Just Ard. the Corner......

Well today was a BIG day:)And a good day-those two things very often dont go well together-LOLOLOL;)But It was a GOOD day :)
I took Pink Flamingo and Stinger to school today to meet their next years teachers.
Flamingo was just giddy with excitement-she found her name outside and I thought she was just going to fall over-she was just sooo pleased to see her name there on the wall:) LOLOLOL. Then we were greated by her teacher. Flamingo stood there with such an angelic grin with her hands behind her back.-It was SOOOOOO funny! LOLOLOLOL I couldnt help but chuckle;)NO worries at all-I could see it in her face:)This teacher went on to show her all ard the room-acting like Flamingo was just the only thing there-Flamingo just ate that right up :)Showed her where her cubby was and the bathroom in the room. Flamingo through this whole process acted like she was floating on a cloud-you could not erase that grin plastered from ear to ear. The whole process was amusing to say the least.LOLOLOL Flamingo is so eager to just jump right in-its crazy, but oh sooo relieveing, and amusing at the same time-kwim:)Whew!LOLOLOL This teacher is WONDERFUL-and you know how you just get that feeling when a teacher is a good one-well shes the cream on top. I know Flamingo is going to just thrive and be soooooooo happy there. :)
Then we went back to the office and had the principle lead us to Stingers room and introduced us to Stingers teacher. Stinger was a statue-twiddling his fingers-I could just see his tummy churning in knots from the look on his face. The teacher took Stinger ard the room and was telling him this and that-Stinger wasnt listening to anything-just was soo nervous and face down. The teacher was trying so hard and just put on a bigger smile. I did notice she has set up a quiet corner in the back of the room-I liked that and its right under a BIG ceiling vent window thing-just really nice and relaxing. I dont think Stinger even noticed or heard her talking about it, but she went on to explain that the room is kinda dark sometimes because they dont have a window-just that ceiling window thing. Agn-I think this will be great for Stinger :)Unless hes looking up at the window thing all the time for spiders and such-theres alot of spider webs-LOLOLOLOL.
I spoke to the teacher asking how she was feeling about everything and told her that I had had a really good relationship with his past teacher-so if there was anything she wanted to say or concerns she was having to feel free to tell me etc. I think, well I know, she is a bit worried-I could just feel it-or maybee its me-LOLOLOL. Anyway I just wanted her to know she could approach me with anything at any time. She said that was really nice to know and that she was so happy that last years teacher and I had a good relationship-she looked relieved. I wonder who she has been talking with???LOLOLOL But she didnt mention all the research she has done to prepare for a child like Stinger????LOLOLOL So Im assuming she hasnt done any research, or learned any tips etc. Thats to be expected though I guess.....I just had thought, since she had already told the principle she was concerned at last years end IEP meeting that she was concerned etc, that she would have looked up a little on things to be a little prepared-kwim .I dont know-call me paranoid I guess, but she told me they were going to have a great year!!! :)So maybee she has????She said that she would see Stinger on Monday and Stinger was too busy getting out of the room to hear her, or just didnt repond.....Which is no surprise as he doesnt answer questions unles you are looking at him and he at you-and that is a feet unto itself. etc....Anyway I got a so-so feeling from her. I asked Stinger what he thought abt her and he said "Good" So thats a GOOD THING! so I guess??? she passed in his eyes???LOLOLOL
We(teacher, spec ed teacher, principle are all meeting on Friday morning to go over the IEP and just make sure everything is set up okay....so we shall see how that goes.... I called the spec ed teacher -just incase he wasnt invited agn;)-as I want him there!!!!You know who WONT be there-the spec ed district lady!!!WHOOT!!!!!!
So it was a GOOD Day-eh? I think so!!!!!!Im hoping everything runs smoothly this year, but just incase we have a couple of bumps-Ive got my cards up my sleeve this go ard:)So Im confident.
Tomorrow is the parade in town as its fair time agn. Should be loads of fun-the kids are all excited abt it!!!Who doesnt have fun at a parade???!!! Littel Monkey has been bugel-ing ard the house-hes all excited:)LOLOLOL-hes such a little funny guy!!
5 MORE DAYS!!!!!:)

HAPPY B-DAY BILLY!!!!!! :)

Monkeys B-day was yesterday. He was so excited! LOLOLOL It was a wonderful day.We all woke him up singing Happy Birthday and he was just all smiles and was galloping ard the house ALL DAY-He was so funny!!!He got a cowboy hat just like Dad, a Thomas the Train set, and cars, cars, and more cars(hey the wheels Im betting will be off in a day or so LOLOLOL)He also got some candy and a screwdriver in a book that he has been carying ard. He says he's going to be buiding a house with it-he-he! HIGH HOPES-EH? LOLOL Some clothes with CARS on them too :) He loved the decorations and they are STILL UP!!!! WOW!!LOLOLOL
We had pizza for dinner-his request;)(okay a little promting from Momma Bear) LOLOLOL Then we had his chocolate cake-it had three more diggers on it-so he liked that-I think better than the cake;)Got it everywhere.......LOLOLOL
He is 4 now-sheesh...He'll be starting K next year!!!He is growing up to be such a little cutie. His smile just warms my heart and I REALLY have a hard time getting on him for things-he's my BABY!!!!HE's just so darn cute-I end up smiling and then I cant stay upset abt what he has done etc.-LOLOLOL. He has stopped bumping into things...which is REALLY good to see, and he made a #2 in the potty yesterday too. I was giving him high fives on that for sure!!!We've been really struggling with that lately. Stinger was the same way-insisting on a diaper for these...but he was sure proud of himself and kept saying he was a big boy now :)So I think the thing is just getting them to do it once, then its good as done kinda deal-its just that first one. We'll have to see, but I sure would like to get rid of the diapers. Night time will take awhile-as he wont realise and has accidenst still.....but we are getting there...slowly........LOLOL
But all in all it was a wonderful day. We sure missed Papa and Nana though-Monkey asked where they were. They have moved, so they wont be able to make it to B-days that much anymore:(So they were sorely missed.
Flamingo has another tooth under her pillow tonight. It FINALLY came out. Poor Pink:( It was turning sideways and she said it wasnt hurting, but ugh-it sure looked like it was. But I made a promise that I wouldnt pull on it-I had two times before and I had hurt her. Oh! Thats the worst-yanking and it still being in there :( So She decided to just pull it out on her own this morning :) What a big girl she was-so its under her pillow. Now she can eat agn!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!LOLOL
Thats abt all thats been going on here. Just getting ready for school to start. I am sooo excited abt Flamingo and how she will like school this year. The principle has made free breakfasts for everyone every day ths next year-so that will be fun-as they are "soooooooo much better than yours Mom"-per Stinger-LOLOL. She's also got her best friend from gymnastics in her class this year-how exciting eh? LOLOL-I think Im more excited than she is though;)But we got some new back-packs at the store-they are big kid ones-with all the pockets and things-no spongebob or tinker bell this time-LOLOL:) But they are all so excited.
Only 2 weeks to go.....:)

Prayers were heard :)

The meeting.....
Where oh where do I start........Didnt go good :( I knew it wasnt-the night before- the spec education teacher called me back and said that he hadnt even been invited which threw me for a loop-I didnt know I could invite him-but I can invite ANYONE, but I didnt know that when I talked with him......sheshh...so I knew I was going in there all alone......but he told me that it was going to be a good meeting and it was just to discuss the test scores, but thought he should have known abt it......red flag!!! Im thinking uh-oh....so he coudlnt go as he was out of town.
So at the meeting it was principle, school psychologist, district lady, and me. The first thing the principle wanted to discuss was "trust." Inside im going "oh great this isnt looking good."-LOLOL So then we get to the test scores. ADOS-Stinger scored low, yes you heard that right, low. The lower the number the more not even on the spectrum.....I couldnt figure this out at all....The ADOS is when a tester comes in and manipulates things trying to get Autism characteristics or symptoms to come out, in a very structured setting with an observer writing everything down. How they talk, how they interact etc. Basically exactly what the Psychiatrist at Childrens did-and he said Stinger was clearly on the spectrum?????The district lady was smiling!!!! She actually told me that the tester had said this child(Stinger) was clearly not on the spectrum more so than any other child she has ever tested. Exactly what did she want me to say to that-I have no idea???Totally disregard a M.D PHD Psychiatrist at a Childrens hospital-and this is who he specializes in is ASD childen, just erase all my research I had looked up and erase all of last year fighting to be heard??? I guess so -I guess she thought this one test would do that?
I could just see the district lady smiling over there-as they now have the "proof" that they need as this one test shows no signs of any Autism characteristics.
The ADI-R test results: All over the board with Autism characteristics????
Then BOOM- they start talking about changing Stingers placement. Out of all the things I had prepared myself for this was not one of the things! LOLOLOL Placement CAN NOT be discussed without the WHOLE IEP team present as it has to be a team decision. So I was thrown for a BIG loopola....."WE have this school in the district over in blah blah blah.........(abt 40 min away)that is set up for certin kids with behavior problems(there we go agn thinking Stingers behaviors are all caused by his willingness to be naughty and that it is soley a behavior problem)
I showed them the paper from the doct where he had stated that Stingers behaviors were caused by his PDD-NOS:not understanding social ques and that Stinger is not an aggresive child and sees no reason to medicate him for this. The doc said also that Stingers problems come from not understanding what the teachers are saying, not understanding what is expected of him , not getting the ques from his peers etc.
The district lady just hemmed and hawd. The doc recomended positives out the ying yang-like every 15 min getting a sticker for not bolting, for raising his hand,keeping his hands to himself, peer group work etc-not disciplinging in a time out room. Also said that timing his bolting would be very innefective as Stinger would not correspond this punishment with his actions. The district lady interupted with "well when we let Stinger get away with these actions we are in essence saying we are lowering our expectations of him. So basically she didnt believe a word of it yet agn-like she usually doesnt.
The next meeting was to be set up at this new school they want to place Stinger in. He would be in a secluded classroom(with a bunch of manipulative kids acting out) where they would work on his behavior-Im sure discipling left and right,)then would be included with the reg classroom slowly , then making it back eventually to his homeschool. Its an EI(Early Intervention)K-3rd grade, program that the district has set up so they can have the spec teachers there with all the paraprofessionals-basically saving them selves $$$$$ not having to provide every school with aides-they simply send your kids THERE......
They asked if there was anyone I wanted at this next meeting and I said the spec education teacher-thinking he was already on the list, but no he wasnt. How is that for thinking of Stingers best interest-not having the one person there who actually knows Stinger and has worked with him.GOOD GRIEF!:P
Anyway thats how the meeting left. I was nice, said I had to talk with dh abt it, but wasn't going to sign anything now and that I needed to talk to my advocate and Law Representation as I didnt think this was a proper placement. Really almost nothing was registering-I was totally in a blur being not prepared for this blow yet agn.:(
I go home talk to dh and call my advocate and the spec ed teacher. All three persons who are very royally upset.
Advocate-says this is not least restrictive environment
Spec Ed teacher-he was HIGHLY upset, discussing this type of topic-placement without him is a BIG NO NO, and he would be making some calls
Disability Law canter-recomended and are setting up an apt to talk to a lawyer in person
Dh-said it sounded like a place where they just try and get rid of problem behavior kids, instead of trying to help them at their home school
So not a very good meeting-seams pretty bad-eh, but it turned ard.
I call the principle the next day stating my concerns, telling him that he can cancel the meeting at this other school as I would not even be able to see it in progress-(NEVER place unless youve seen deal)Stinger will be starting on meds and I want to keep an eye on that closer to home, etc.and was VERY restrictive and I didnt agree with it.
Guess what the principel says: "I am new to this case, and I can honestly say that this placement is wrong for Stinger, having talked with others I have come to realise new information that wasnt presented to me before that I had no knowlege of at the meeting. Last year we did not do enough for Stinger, we could have done alot more. I dont think we should have even talked abt a different placement as we are no where near that stage yet.I am behind you 100% and feel the same way that you do and agree with you. I will cancel the meeting and next years teacher, you, and I and the spec ed teacher will meet and discuss how we can help meet Stingers needs next year. Understand that I am an advocate for you and your husband and Stinger and I was not given all the information-and I will be behind whatever you choose."
CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT-total flip flop from the meeting! Hmmmmmmmm.....I wonder who he's been talking to-someone- obviously not the district lady.......wow-someone really let him know what has been going on. Whew! Thats all im going to say-Ive been pretty shaken up by the whole thing and Ive been walking ard on cloud nine, but realizing I came awful close to having to go somewhere that I didnt want to go to-know what I mean? :)
But I am soooooooo HAPPY!!!!!! I think Im really going to like this next years principle-a big wig actually not listeneing to the district-can you imagine!!!!!!LOLOLOL
So all is right with the world agn-thank goodness....I must have grown abt 50 gray hairs on WED!!!If anyone is still reading this I told you it had a good ending-eh? :)Thank you for all your prayers....They were heard!!!!!!
OH-Flamingo is doing well, the two teeth just will not come out, but she is bouncing and dancing ard like her usual self-LOLOLOL-Just waiting to put them under her pillow ;)But everything is healing fine like the dentist said it would :)So we are all just waiting...and waiting... and waiting...LOLOLOL